Every Friday Night, I give up an hour to go to a Meditation class. There are probably a lot of other things I could do after work on Friday, but I really love starting my weekend by shaking off everything that came from the week. I rarely find that I feel the same way about Mondays – you’ll probably never hear someone say, “oh boy do I need to let go of all that fun and relaxation so I can get to work!”
With that, you might imagine a bunch of crazy hippy people meditating, but our class is primarily made up of Professional people (our regulars include a lawyer, two real estate agents, a couple business owners, etc). I really like this class because our teacher brings a new type of mediation every week so we can explore different mentalities. One thing they all tend to have in common are the 7 Chakras, which are in the body and each stand for a different part of life:
- Root Chakra – Grounding and Survival
- Navel Chakra – Pleasure and Creativity.
- Solar Plexus Chakra – Self-perception, Flow in Life.
- Heart Chakra – Love and Compassion.
- Throat Chakra – Communication and Self Expression.
- Brow Chakra – Intuition and Self-Reflection.
- Crown Chakra – Spirituality.
Whether you believe in them or not, what I like about the Chakra’s is that they break life out into several parts. And the mentality is that you have to actually find a balance within each – you can over or under focus on each of these areas. Think of the person that is all about work and has time for nothing else. Or the person that is so caught up in their relationship that they have no life of his/her own.
What I really want to focus on is what the Solar Plexus Chakra manifests as: CONTROL. This weekend I spoke to a couple different people about the current political landscape, and I was awed by how much stress they make for themselves over things they play no part in. I see this all the time on different scales – people sacrifice their time and energy for stuff that they can’t effect. A smaller example would road rage at other drivers (I’m very guilty here) or the weather. I think it’s important to know what’s going on, and be properly informed on the world we live it. At the same time, I don’t need an ulcer because the politicians can’t figure out a workable budget. These things, we all need to just acknowledge and let go.
On the other end of the spectrum, I see people all the time that take no control of their own life. This doesn’t necessarily mean they aren’t responsible, just that all the decisions were made for them. They never took part in writing their own story. This, of course, is not the correct balance either. Maybe you should be the next Oprah, but if you don’t do the work to get there, and make the right decisions, that doesn’t mean squat.
So here’s how the Balance comes in – there are three levels of control. As in individual, you should assign everything in life to one of these categories, and act accordingly.
1. Direct Control – These are the things that you influence directly. You can identify them by asking “Does my decision / action alone change this?” Many of the parts of life that fall into this category are personal. For example, your reaction/feelings, what you study, your motivation or effort, where you live, etc. You alone determine the outcome, and, therefore, you alone should make the decision that is best suited to you.
2. Indirect Control – These are the things you influence to a degree, but there are other influences besides yourself. Getting a family member to make a decision, or your pet to obey you for example, can fall into these categories. You can provide motivation to get the decision you want, but ultimately you don’t make the final decision. Personally, I find that in the middle of a sale my prospects are in this category. I can offer them incentives and be a great rep, and that will most likely influence the final decision, but it does not make it.
3. No Control – These are the things you have 0 influence on what-so-ever. These include things like the weather, what’s going on in the government (unless it’s a voting day / you’re a politician). These are other peoples decisions, i.e. prospects after they decide No or my neighbors’ dogs barking. I do not play a role in those arena’s, and therefore should not let them effect me directly. These are the things you need to just let go.
I know this started a little off my usual beat, but I try to stay true to my inspiration in writing these posts. And no matter how you get to the conclusion, it’s important to know the difference between what you can change and what you can’t. Next time you start to feel stressed or worked-up over something, as yourself which category it falls into, and if you can do nothing (or you’ve done everything you can), just let it go!